He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
The adults are the big ones right?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....