$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
My liver just broke up with me...
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
Me, myself and I
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
How drunk are you??