how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I pooped in a mop bucket.
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Ambien. No doubt about it.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.