No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".