I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
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I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me