I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Send us your Text From Last Night!
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend