im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan