Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
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Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
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The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
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According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.