Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
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love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
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All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
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Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.