she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Send us your Text From Last Night!
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious