you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off