I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Send us your Text From Last Night!
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".