bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...