he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.