I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Send us your Text From Last Night!
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.