we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.