Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling