slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.