Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Send us your Text From Last Night!
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
23 “Girl Codes” Guys Probably Don’t Know About
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.