I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
two words...techno handjob
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.