seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
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I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.