Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.