You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
cat food counts as protein by the way
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.