He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?