The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
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Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.