im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.