Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.