they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes