Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
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Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
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I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint