if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.