Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar