Texts From Last Night

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(443): View more from Maryland

My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT

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(443): My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT http://tfl.nu/f0p2

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(616): View more from Michigan

I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!

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(616): I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off! http://tfl.nu/woe1

Replies (50) Good night (3243) Bad night (593)
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(+44): View more from England

if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed

(+44): View more from England

keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction

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(+44): if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed (+44): keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction http://tfl.nu/lbnu

Replies (18) Good night (4481) Bad night (470)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move

(617): View more from Massachusetts

that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame

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(508): dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move (617): that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame http://tfl.nu/79g6

Replies (15) Good night (6510) Bad night (618)
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(703): View more from Virginia

His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?

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(703): His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into? http://tfl.nu/n657

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(856): View more from New Jersey

i think my mom watched the whole time

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(856): i think my mom watched the whole time http://tfl.nu/ceac

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(409): View more from Texas

i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.

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(409): i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24. http://tfl.nu/ryw9

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(817): View more from Texas

I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?

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(817): I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf? http://tfl.nu/ht45

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(778): View more from British Columbia

I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now

(604): View more from British Columbia

That's weird, I usually just count sheep

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(778): I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now (604): That's weird, I usually just count sheep http://tfl.nu/h1kv

Replies (14) Good night (959) Bad night (3258)
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(325): View more from Texas

wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"

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(325): wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah" http://tfl.nu/d8s5

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(616): View more from Michigan

His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"

(616): View more from Michigan

He did it well too

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(616): His pickup line was "I'll eat you out" (616): He did it well too http://tfl.nu/h6lm

Replies (57) Good night (8740) Bad night (621)
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(248): View more from Michigan

apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference

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(248): apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference http://tfl.nu/k6zm

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(512): View more from Texas

Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.

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(512): Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out. http://tfl.nu/0209

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck

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(780): Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck http://tfl.nu/npsc

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(828): View more from North Carolina

All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.

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(828): All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU. http://tfl.nu/f6ai

Replies (33) Good night (3122) Bad night (1347) Order T-Shirt

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