I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
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...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools