I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin