Texts From Last Night

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(970): View more from Colorado

I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now

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(970): I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now http://tfl.nu/72p0

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(805): View more from California

So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair

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(805): So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair http://tfl.nu/hci6

Replies (9) Good night (1801) Bad night (495) Order T-Shirt
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(415): View more from California

just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?

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(415): just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good? http://tfl.nu/tswm

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(949): View more from California

either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating

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(949): either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating http://tfl.nu/qtb8

Replies (6) Good night (2858) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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(212): View more from New York

btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up

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(212): btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up http://tfl.nu/jzw8

Replies (30) Good night (1012) Bad night (4742) Order T-Shirt
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(216): View more from Ohio

Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.

(440): View more from Ohio

Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?

(216): View more from Ohio

Holy shit r u serious? How?

(440): View more from Ohio

Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.

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(216): Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks. (440): Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf? (216): Holy shit r u serious? How? (440): Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you. http://tfl.nu/xwoo

Replies (156) Good night (6800) Bad night (40796)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?

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(402): Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me? http://tfl.nu/agne

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(312): View more from Illinois

sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.

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(312): sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought. http://tfl.nu/msp2

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(352): View more from Florida

I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk

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(352): I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk http://tfl.nu/lbo9

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(615): View more from Tennessee

so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me

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(615): so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me http://tfl.nu/hnft

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.

(608): View more from Wisconsin

Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.

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(608): Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting. (608): Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro. http://tfl.nu/1sa0

Replies (18) Good night (1032) Bad night (2429)
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(478): View more from Georgia

So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis

(410): View more from Maryland

Sounds like a really classy character....

(478): View more from Georgia

He is classy. It was argyle.

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(478): So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis (410): Sounds like a really classy character.... (478): He is classy. It was argyle. http://tfl.nu/j1fr

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(404): View more from Georgia

I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.

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(404): I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00. http://tfl.nu/7rzt

Replies (9) Good night (4988) Bad night (919)
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(512): View more from Texas

i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy

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(512): i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy http://tfl.nu/sv21

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(469): View more from Texas

Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them

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(469): Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them http://tfl.nu/zk8b

Replies (7) Good night (2731) Bad night (570) Order T-Shirt

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