she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.