There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.