We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
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I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking