Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
I am invincible.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.