I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Send us your Text From Last Night!
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.