He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
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I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
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hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
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dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?