Texts From Last Night

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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?

(773): View more from Illinois

Too tired to pretend that I care : (

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(847): I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over? (773): Too tired to pretend that I care : ( http://tfl.nu/bskc

Replies (29) Good night (954) Bad night (7736)
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(305): View more from Florida

We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.

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(305): We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs. http://tfl.nu/e91l

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(719): View more from Colorado

I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.

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(719): I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment. http://tfl.nu/wmih

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(908): View more from New Jersey

the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.

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(908): the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime. http://tfl.nu/3xvq

Replies (22) Good night (2618) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
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(705): View more from Ontario

Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence

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(705): Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence http://tfl.nu/779y

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(423): View more from Tennessee

it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.

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(423): it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me. http://tfl.nu/odtr

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(571): View more from Virginia

So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.

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(571): So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder. http://tfl.nu/3ets

Replies (275) Good night (4045) Bad night (68254)
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(217): View more from Illinois

How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???

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(217): How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you??? http://tfl.nu/p9qq

Replies (174) Good night (2694) Bad night (32205) Order T-Shirt
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(305): View more from Florida

i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.

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(305): i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher. http://tfl.nu/huem

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings

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(724): dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings http://tfl.nu/fi5x

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.

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(504): Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to. http://tfl.nu/jn1k

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(443): View more from Maryland

just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad

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(443): just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad http://tfl.nu/g8m9

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.

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(403): My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator. http://tfl.nu/0m79

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(203): View more from Connecticut

listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating

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(203): listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating http://tfl.nu/olru

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(509): View more from Washington

Can I ask u a weird question?

(1-509): View more from Washington

Sure

(509): View more from Washington

do u have the hershy squirts too?

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(509): Can I ask u a weird question? (1-509): Sure (509): do u have the hershy squirts too? http://tfl.nu/s8pz

Replies (20) Good night (450) Bad night (3450)

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