shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
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Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.