I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.