Texts From Last Night

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(716): View more from New York

angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up

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(716): angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up http://tfl.nu/mr2g

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.

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(321): You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called. http://tfl.nu/6o7h

Replies (12) Good night (924) Bad night (5621)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower

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(508): Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower http://tfl.nu/74dl

Replies (21) Good night (9414) Bad night (604)
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(850): View more from Florida

She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.

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(850): She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November. http://tfl.nu/riz6

Replies (90) Good night (940) Bad night (5807)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now

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(614): I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now http://tfl.nu/fog4

Replies (9) Good night (3407) Bad night (747)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with

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(978): you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with http://tfl.nu/g7w5

Replies (41) Good night (1022) Bad night (5267)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.

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(860): Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god. http://tfl.nu/co52

Replies (30) Good night (1353) Bad night (10223)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.

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(609): he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/w4ku

Replies (17) Good night (691) Bad night (6667)
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(909): View more from California

i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.

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(909): i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar. http://tfl.nu/5kvp

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(706): View more from Georgia

Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.

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(706): Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day. http://tfl.nu/8doe

Replies (17) Good night (7802) Bad night (650)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty

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(856): Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty http://tfl.nu/h187

Replies (14) Good night (810) Bad night (3214)
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(334): View more from Alabama

you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?

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(334): you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that? http://tfl.nu/908j

Replies (38) Good night (1455) Bad night (3360)
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(818): View more from California

I just ran into the couch, vagina first.

(1-818): View more from California

I hope you got dinner out of it

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(818): I just ran into the couch, vagina first. (1-818): I hope you got dinner out of it http://tfl.nu/uzwb

Replies (15) Good night (4210) Bad night (824)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you

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(617): a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you</3 http://tfl.nu/z6s1

Replies (32) Good night (1300) Bad night (8461)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.

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(614): Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by. http://tfl.nu/jzor

Replies (49) Good night (1090) Bad night (4875)

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