The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
