Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Send us your Text From Last Night!
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car