I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys