I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
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Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
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I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
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In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.