I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Send us your Text From Last Night!
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
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Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
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I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?