I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Send us your Text From Last Night!
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.