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    (310): View more from California

    so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?

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    Replies (33) Good night (727) Bad night (4250) Order T-Shirt
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    (810): View more from Michigan

    Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.

    (1-810): View more from Michigan

    Thanks dad.

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    Replies (24) Good night (967) Bad night (4528) Order T-Shirt
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    (312): View more from Illinois

    kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.

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    Replies (71) Good night (560) Bad night (4632)
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    (641): View more from Iowa

    FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER

    (1-641): View more from Iowa

    STOP listening to that song

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    Replies (78) Good night (5131) Bad night (831) Order T-Shirt
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    (347): View more from New York

    apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.

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    Replies (56) Good night (724) Bad night (4721) Order T-Shirt
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    (610): View more from Pennsylvania

    I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair

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    Replies (25) Good night (1105) Bad night (3466) Order T-Shirt
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    (248): View more from Michigan

    I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.

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    Replies (73) Good night (568) Bad night (2966) Order T-Shirt
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    (860): View more from Connecticut

    I can't believe he cheated

    (1-860): View more from Connecticut

    Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how

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    Replies (37) Good night (877) Bad night (2948) Order T-Shirt
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    (828): View more from North Carolina

    God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.

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    Replies (25) Good night (3396) Bad night (879) Order T-Shirt
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    (847): View more from Illinois

    so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner

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    Replies (20) Good night (4672) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
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    (312): View more from Illinois

    Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex

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    Replies (20) Good night (4225) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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    (337): View more from Louisiana

    thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts

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    Replies (16) Good night (597) Bad night (3228) Order T-Shirt
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    (631): View more from New York

    I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?

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    Replies (12) Good night (5563) Bad night (481) Order T-Shirt
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    (410): View more from Maryland

    guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.

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    Replies (37) Good night (7544) Bad night (1333) Order T-Shirt
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    (240): View more from Maryland

    At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka

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    Replies (21) Good night (925) Bad night (5337) Order T-Shirt
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  • (859): The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow http://t.co/sQOeFAaf
  • (270): him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
  • (627): The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
  • (402): Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
  • (724): A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
  • (303): Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

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