I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?