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Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
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