I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.