That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch