Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....