It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed