Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Follow @tfln
Cracked IndieClick Humor